heart spill // november

November 18, 2015

november // livelovesimple.com

november // livelovesimple.com

november // livelovesimple.com

november // livelovesimple.com

november // livelovesimple.com

november // livelovesimple.com

november // livelovesimple.com

november // livelovesimple.com

november // livelovesimple.com

november // livelovesimple.com

november // livelovesimple.com

november // livelovesimple.com

november // livelovesimple.com

november // livelovesimple.com

november // livelovesimple.com

november // livelovesimple.com

november // livelovesimple.com

november // livelovesimple.com

My heart is preparing itself for winter. I find myself wondering how I will survive. These seasons of my life are the hardest and the most full of wonder that I will ever know.

There is the solitude of marriage; the solitude of motherhood; the solitude of snow, just on the horizon.

How will I go on?

The days are long and hard. The darkness comes too early, again. I think, “This, too, shall pass.” Although the little voice that lives in my heart says, “No. Stay. Freeze here, time. Don’t let them grow. Don’t let them leave me.”

The season of my life has turned. I used to live with the fear of losing romantic love, afraid of loneliness in that way. Now I live in with fear of my children growing away from me. Still babies, but I’ve been taught for a lifetime how quickly it will pass. And even as the hands of the clock drag slowly through these saddest hours–I know now. My baby is a little boy already.

I live with it. The ache of knowing the very preciousness of these moments. It pulls at me. Weights me down, like grief.

Have faith, old heart. After night comes day. After winter comes spring.

6 Comments

  • Sandra Azar

    yes time goes too fast and we all always rush towards it!

    • Dena

      It’s so true! I’ve been doing my very best not to rush it. Although some moments, it can’t be helped. <3

  • Imogen

    Look at that light! You certainly are talented behind the camera. And yes, it goes fast, far too fast. Next year my oldest starts school, my middle will be at preschool 3 days and only my youngest will be with me full time. The baby years have passed in a blink of an eye.

  • Amanda

    Your photography skills are amazing! Truly! I feel the same way with my children. It can grip hold of me so tight that I feel like I can’t breathe at times. I just have to remind myself not to allow anxiety over things I cannot control take over. More than ever, I find myself relishing each simple moment with them!

    • Dena

      Amanda, thank you so much for your kind words. You are so sweet. It is always so nice to realize that none of use are alone. xoxo

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