Here on the blog I’ve written about divorce, but I have yet to talk about what came next for me. I am working on a series of posts about separation, divorce, single motherhood, starting over, and transitioning to a blended family. Based on those topics, you can tell that it has been an “interesting” few years for me, laced with pain, learning, healing, and growth. The most important lesson that I have taken away from it all is that you need to be happy with yourself before you can be happy with another person. It sounds trite and we’ve all heard it before, but when you’ve gone through it, you learn that it is not just a catch phrase, it is the absolute truth.

If you follow me on social media, then you’ve read about my new partner, but I am excited to share some of this new adventure here, too. And, I am especially happy to share these beautiful photographs taken by my sweet and talented friend, Erin. I will get into some deeper stuff in future posts. Today, I want to take a lighter approach and talk about some of the fun ways that I’ve learned to keep a relationship healthy.

Life has a way of getting in the way when it comes to relationships. In the beginning, there is so much love and excitement, but add kids, a career, and a house to the mix, and things can fall apart quickly. Suddenly, it feels as though there is no time for love. You spend less and less quality time together, you begin growing apart, arguments arise about trivial things, and before you know it, you’re questioning the future of your relationship.

Though no relationship is perfect, many long-term relationships end simply because both parties forget just how much work it takes to keep things together. They often lose themselves to providing and caring for their families and essentially forget why they fell in love in the first place.

The truth is, if you want to keep your relationship together, you have to be willing to work at it daily. If the two of you decide to continually choose each other and prioritize your relationship needs, you can sustain a happy and healthy relationship. Below, are some suggestions on how to do this.

Schedule Time to Talk
Communication is key. Daily responsibilities and routines can take up a great deal of your time, but communication within your relationships is of the utmost importance. If you find that you’re not talking much, pencil time in your day to do so. You can both wake up a few minutes earlier than the kids and have a conversation over a cup of coffee or you can talk just before you turn in for bed. For heavier conversations, schedule some time on the weekend to talk on a scenic drive or a walk outside.

Plan Date Nights
The monotony of a relationship can put distance between any couple. Life can’t always be spontaneous, but that doesn’t mean you can’t go out and have a good time. Start scheduling date nights a couple times a month. Do things that you both enjoy and avoid stressful topics like money, home, the kids, or work in conversation while you’re out. Just spend time enjoying each other’s company.

Flirt with Each Other
When you were dating chances are you gave each other compliments all the time. These words made your heart sing. Even after being together for years, hearing your partner tell you how attractive you are or how much they want you in a flirtatious way does wonders for your self-esteem and the relationship. So whether you flirt in person, send them a cute text message, or leave cute little notes for them to find around the house, just let your partner know how desirable you still find them.

Give Each Other Gifts from the Heart
For people that speak the love language of gift-giving, receiving a present from their partner out of the blue makes them feel special. There’s nothing wrong with splurging on your loved one on occasion. Especially if you know it’s something they will really appreciate. You can make something from the heart like a painting, sculpture, or scarf, or you can buy them something nice like a necklace, watch, or ring from Diamonds Forever San Diego. You don’t have to break the bank to let your partner know you were thinking of them.

Vacation Together
When is the last time you and your partner went on a nice vacation just the two of you? If it’s been a while, perhaps it’s time to plan a little romantic getaway. Even leaving town for the weekend can really help to strengthen your relationship and improve your happiness. Don’t let your budget keep you from getting away from it all to refocus on each other for a bit. You can get a nice hotel a few miles away from home and spend the time together ordering room service and binge-watching your favorite movies or you can plan a week-long trip to a tropical destination and lounge around the beach, go for a hike, and enjoy fancy restaurants.


Love is the greatest and most beautiful gift that we are given in life. It isn’t always easy, but it is so worth it. Next to prioritizing your own wellness, investing time in keeping your relationship happy and healthy is the best thing that you can do for your family. Everyone will benefit from the overflow of love that is created when you put in the effort and choose each other every day.

Thank you to the talented Erin Galardi of Ruffles and Trains Photography for the gorgeous photographs in this post.

2 thoughts on “Growing in Love: Keeping a Relationship Happy”

  1. Beautiful and inspiring, and yes tears are falling silently down my cheeks at my desk while eating my hummus and crackers….the good tears, ya know.

Leave a Comment