marina grace at two months //

Two-Month-Old Marina Grace

DenaMay 20, 2015

marina grace at two months //

marina grace at two months //

marina grace at two months //

My, how much has changed since last month. One day you have a reasonably normal newborn on your hands, and the next day you have a screaming banshee who’s shattering your nerves around the clock.

In her second month, Marina presented a full-blown case of colic. I’ve spent the past four weeks with this little girl strapped to my chest nearly constantly, as wearing her has been the only way to soothe her. It’s been difficult to say the very least. There have been a lot of moments when I’ve said, I’m not enjoying this. I don’t like having a newborn. I just want this to be over. And that is a far cry from how I imagined I would feel through Marina’s first months. I wanted to cherish every moment. I wanted time to pass slowly. And yet, here I am, in tears at least once a day, praying for an end to this madness.

As difficult as it has been, I wouldn’t trade it. I love this sweet girl to pieces. A couple of weeks ago she started smiling & cooing and it truly is the sweetest thing ever. Just one of those little smiles takes away all of the pain of the endless crying — at least for a little while.

We had her two-month checkup last week and she passed with flying colours. She’s gaining height (82 percentile) and weight (88 percentile) beautifully. The pediatrician assured me that she is perfectly healthy, just colicky. It was a relief and a disappointment at the same time. Of course I am immeasurably grateful that she is healthy; but it’s disappointing to know that there is “nothing wrong” and nothing that I can fix. Hearing my baby cry and being unable to help her devastates me. It’s a feeling that all mother’s know and it never gets easier. A friend recently reminded me– “Little kids, little problems. Big kids, big problems.” I’m trying to remember that and to embrace the knowledge that this, too, shall pass.

Not the most glamorous topic, but I cut out dairy for awhile. Although it didn’t help with the colic, she has had some “poop” issues since I’ve reintroduced it. I might cut it out again. I’ve also been struggling with the whole notion of breastfeeding. I love nursing my baby, but I often wonder if she would be happier on formula. I know that breastfeeding her is the best thing for her, so I feel selfish to consider giving her formula just to make her more content. I’m really not sure what the future holds. I’m taking it one day at a time and trying desperately hard to keep it all in perspective.

I’ve heard from many that colic tends to let up around three months, so I truly hope that I’ll have much happier news to report next month. In the meanwhile, I hope that you’ll enjoy this set of photographs as much as I do. Lately, Marina has been having beautiful periods of contentment for about five to ten minutes following her longer naps. I always use those content periods to snap some photographs of her. I didn’t catch her smiling this time, but I love these just the same.

Even though things are hard, I know how blessed I am and I don’t take it for granted. I am grateful for this sweet girl’s presence in our family. I kiss her soft, chubby, baby cheeks often & I cherish these days — hard as they may be, they’re infinitely precious to me.

marina grace at two months //

marina grace at two months //

marina grace at two months //

marina grace at two months //

marina grace at two months //

marina grace at two months //

marina grace at two months //

Marina’s gorgeous headbands are from a sweet little Etsy shop called Babylicious Divas.

Comments (5)

  • Gillian

    May 20, 2015 at 9:12 am

    Gorgeous photos!!! So sorry to hear about the struggles you have had, honestly is sounds SO hard. It can be such a struggle to enjoy motherhood when dealing with issues like you are, hang in there and take care of yourself!

    1. Dena

      May 20, 2015 at 9:20 am

      Thanks so much, Gillian. It is hard, but it’s worth it. Kind words from friends like you make the load so much easier to bear! xoxo

  • Tina

    May 20, 2015 at 6:56 pm

    I am sooo jealous of these BEAUTIFUL photos you have taken of her!!! You photograph little babies so well and I love the flowers / lighting. I had to switch to formula for a few health reasons and it was hard on me, still is, but I’d do anything for my girly. She just could not latch correctly, never wanted my boobs and so she didn’t drink enough ever, and it made her cry all night long (only at night for some reason). The second I switched to a sensitive formula she stopped her crying and was the happiest baby and had zero issues. It was really hard on me emotionally and I still don’t know if it was the right choice but it’s what I did. I hope that Marina ends her colic before 3 months!!!

  • Sara

    May 21, 2015 at 9:06 am

    Was just browsing around and found your beautiful blog and just wanted to say hi…

    Absolutely amazingly stunning photos! Wish I had your photo skill. Take care and all the best wishes to you and your family.

  • Momista Beginnings

    June 4, 2015 at 10:13 pm

    Such a beauty. I gave up breastfeeding so much earlier than I had liked or hoped for or planned. But I just couldn’t hack it with a screaming girl who struggled and refused and looked absolutely miserable. I tried pumping but hardly made enough to satisfy her. So formula it was. I plan to write a more detailed post on the subject, actually. I felt so much guilt for quitting, but I can’t tell you how much of a better place I was in after doing so. Margo? Same screaming baby. But at least I knew she was getting enough to eat. Anyways, I’m absolutely in love with how you photographed Marina this month. I can tell that you’ve just been dying to have a girl! 🙂 Fun, right?

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