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A life you’re proud of…

livelovesimple.com

livelovesimple.com

For what it’s worth: it’s never too late or, in my case, too early to be whoever you want to be. There’s no time limit, stop whenever you want. You can change or stay the same, there are no rules to this thing. We can make the best or the worst of it. I hope you make the best of it. And I hope you see things that startle you. I hope you feel things you never felt before. I hope you meet people with a different point of view. I hope you live a life you’re proud of. If you find that you’re not, I hope you have the strength to start all over again. —from The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

I know that I’ve shared that quote a million times already, but it’s so important to me. I’ve been reading it daily, sometimes multiple times a day, for weeks now. There are big and difficult things happening in my life, things that I don’t always have the heart to write about, but that quote sums it up pretty well. It’s why I’ve always done what I’ve always done and why I’ll always do what I’ll always do.

February is slowly (oh-so-slowly) rolling to a close and I’ve decided to take inventory. I started twenty-fourteen off on the right foot eliminating negativity/toxicity and focusing inward. However, what I’ve learned about goals is how quickly we tend to forget about them. Not surprisingly, I’ve been slipping a bit myself. The energy around the start of the year is invigorating, but it quickly fizzles. It’s important that we re-evaluate and re-focus regularly.

Lately: I am taking more risks professionally. I am attending poetry circle at my local library. I’ve started reading again (actual books, not just blogs!). It feels as though I am coming out of a cocoon and it’s not just because winter will end soon. I was wrapped up in pregnancy, then postpartum, then other problems. For a long time, I couldn’t see the forest through the trees. I am slowly finding my way back to myself and learning how to be me and be a mother, which is harder than I’d anticipated.

livelovesimple.com

livelovesimple.com

livelovesimple.com

livelovesimple.com

livelovesimple.com

livelovesimple.com

livelovesimple.com

livelovesimple.com

Forgive me if I sound like a broken record lately. One of the reasons that I am so stuck on the Benjamin Button quote is because it is the advice that I will one day give my son. If I can teach him to live by that piece of advice, then I believe that I will have taught him everything that he’ll ever need to know. The problem, however, is that I — myself — am not living by that advice, not completely. I do not want to be a parent who says, “Do as I say, not as I do.” That’s why it is so important to me to get where I need to be and to live as an example to him.

livelovesimple.com

livelovesimple.com

I hope you live a life you’re proud of. If you find that you’re not, I hope you have the strength to start all over again.

All of this and so much more—
xo

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    Is Your Resume a Hallmark Card?

    This is a guest post by David Pinkley, The Resume Sage.

    How do you describe yourself in your resume: team player?…quick learner?…detailed oriented? Do you really believe those self-proclaimed descriptions? Consider this: so does everyone else. That’s the problem. When it comes to describing ourselves we use the same words as everyone else. I know this because in 15 years working as a professional resume writer and executive recruiter I’ve seen nearly 40,000 resumes. Virtually all of them used works like: high energy, results oriented, uniquely qualified, detailed oriented, out-of-the-box thinker…and the list goes on. I call these Hallmark words.

    What is a Hallmark word? Example: You go to the store to buy a greeting card for your Sweetie whose birthday is approaching. You are overwhelmed because there are so many cards to choose from. You select your first one and it says something like: “May you experience all things bright and beautiful on your special day. Happy Birthday.” It’s a nice try but the message is contrived so we put the card back and pick another. The second one says: “Here’s a card just for you. You’ve always been tried and true. Happy Birthday.” Again, nice words but the message isn’t meaningful. (Who writes this stuff!?) You repeat this process numerous times until you find one with a message that resonates: “It just always felt right…and it always will. Happy Birthday.” Found it. You’re done.

    Hallmark words are words that look great on paper but don’t have any real meaning. It’s the same with resumes. Certain words look great on resumes but they are meaningless. If everyone says they’re a quick learner those words become diluted. (Whether it’s true or not is irrelevant.) Using Hallmark words on your resume will make it seem just as contrived as most greeting cards. The reader (i.e. hiring manager) won’t believe your message and will continue reading other resumes in search of one that resonates.

    The reality is we really don’t know how to describe ourselves. So we borrow words from other resumes and convince ourselves that these words really describe us. We don’t realize they have no meaning. Great resumes find authentic ways to communicate familiar themes. How do you do that?

    If you are really honest with yourself – you probably don’t know what you really do anyway. The only way to discover exactly what makes you unique is to look closely at your job. This takes introspection and self examination; a process most people dread because it seems like hard work – hence why most resumes are homogeneous. This is difficult to do for yourself. Self examination is much easier if you do it with someone else. But that’s another post.

    Blow the dust off your resume and take a look at the words you’ve used to describe yourself. Are they Hallmark words? If they are, you need to recognize that you are not saying anything unique. And no matter how true they are, they are not as meaningful or impactful as you think.

    Have questions? Contact David Pinkley at (704) 358-6000 or david@theresumesage.com. To learn more visit: www.TheResumeSage.com

    David Pinkley is the founder of The Resume Sage, a custom resume writing service. The Resume Sage critiques and writes resumes for accomplished professionals and executives. Those who work with The Resume Sage are purposeful about navigating their careers. They need more than just strong writing skills; they are seeking insights about how to differentiate themselves from their peers/competitors.

    David is a sought-after public speaker and has been featured on local news and NBC’s national news. He earned a B.S. degree from the University of Michigan and started his career in Chicago as a CPA at Ernst & Young and at Bank of America. He has lived and worked as an executive recruiter for 15 years in Charlotte, Raleigh, New York and Hong Kong.

22 Comments

  1. Wow!! I have never seen this movie, I have also never heard or read this quote anywhere else before. Thank you for sharing it. It reminds me of a song that always hits home for me “But you know that when the truth is told
    That you can get what you want
    Or you can just get old
    You’re gonna kick off before you even get halfway through (Oooh)
    When will you realize… Vienna waits for you?” Vienna by Billy Joel, perhaps you know it, if not take a listen. I hope you get through whatever it is, and come out stronger on the other side.

  2. I love that quote as well. Every time we talk/visit, I see you grow so much — your beautiful wedding, Roman, wood burning stove, house of leaves turning into everything you dreamed and more. You have always had a gift with words and perhaps instead of being an English teacher for the masses, you will be the best teacher R could ask for. I am glad that you are reading and writing again; I am so impressed to hear about your life and how you process and face your challenges. Dena, you are an inspiration and I hope you are proud if where you are & where you’re going. All of that is because of where you have been— the places you will revisit AND those that you hope not to.

  3. How handsome is he! its a great quote- and something I talk about with my daughter is having the best life and your such a great mommy for instilling such great little pearls of wisdoms (or maybe big pearls of wisdom hehe) 🙂

  4. I sometimes think we are too hard on ourselves and we should just let it be OK to constantly change and reinvent ourselves. Like the cells in our body, we are not the same person we were a year ago, a week ago or even a day ago.

    And goodness, this mom business IS hard! But, I’m up for the challenge>: )

  5. This is perfect and much needed. I think I may love that quote forever, in fact. Its so hard some days to remember all these goals and things we try so hard for, they are much easier to keep in mind on the good days for sure. Hopefully March brings more ‘good’ days and easy days for all of us! And of course, your photos are beautiful. xoxo

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