
Three years ago, I was nearly $60,000 in debt. I had a Bachelor’s degree that didn’t appear to be worth its weight in salt and a job that couldn’t cover a fraction of my monthly bills. I was terrified.
Today, I am closer to complete financial freedom than I ever dreamed possible. Last week, I paid off my last remaining credit card balance. This two-part post is a celebration of this incredible milestone in my journey.
In part one, I will explain how I got to that terrible place. In part two, I will explain how I’m getting out of it (and how you can do it, too).
————————————————————————
A financial prison is the worst sort of prison to be stuck in. A financial prison does not have steel bars or a prison warden. You will not get sent to financial prison for committing a crime. There is only one person that can sentence you to financial prison. That person is you.
There are two primary types of financial prisoners:
1. There are those in financial prison who got there because they truly did not know any better. This type eventually realizes the error of their ways and breaks free.
2. There are those who knowingly commit themselves to financial prison. This type is well aware of the consequences of living beyond her means; but she does it anyway.
Of course there are also those who fall somewhere in the middle, like me… (Cue dream sequence.) It all started when I was 18. The guidance counseling systems in my high school and college were either completely inadequate or I simply refused to pay attention. I can’t honestly remember which it was, though I think it was the former. Either way, I was screwed.
Before me, no one in my family had ever been to college so I didn’t receive much advice. I was thrilled to be out of high school and ready for the next step. I took my SATs one time and applied to one school. My parents, being average folks, made just enough money to prevent me from receiving financial aid; but not enough money to be able to pay my full tuition. For me, this meant loans: “lovely” student loans from “lovely” Sallie Mae.
My mother co-signed and it was a cinch from there. Each semester I filled out a relatively simple form and like magic, Sallie Mae sent me a check. In fact, Sallie Mae was so generous that they allowed me to take out as much “extra” money as I needed every semester. It was fantastic! Yes, I had money to pay for books, meals, and extra curricula. I also had money to go out and binge drink, buy clothes I didn’t need, designer purses, and more. Sallie Mae was wonderful to me. And the best part if it was that there was no need for discussion. No one guided me, no one advised me, and no one asked me any questions. I showed up at the financial aid office a couple of times each year and it was always smooth sailing.
On top of that, another great thing happened when I was 18! The credit card companies started to send me applications. And that was just as easy. I got one and then another and then another. Whatever I couldn’t cover with those pretty little checks from Sallie Mae, I could simply charge on my credit cards. College was good to me. I joined a sorority, I partied hard, I shopped until I dropped. What more could a girl ask for?
It wasn’t all fun & games though. I worked through college. I worked at a children’s camp each summer; I was a Spanish teacher for two years; and toward the end of my college career I was a bookseller at Borders bookstore. All of the money I made working was spending money for me. I had Sallie Mae and the credit cards to pay all of my “real” bills.
When I finally graduated, I was making a cool $8.25 an hour at Borders. I loved it. I was happy… until one day, out of no where, a letter came in the mail. I had a six month grace period and then I would have to start paying back those loans. My paychecks barely covered my minimum credit card payments. How was I going to make loan payments on top of that?
So I sat down and did something that I’d never done before. I wrote up a budget. It was horrifying when I realized that even if I’d had no other bills, my monthly wages from Borders wouldn’t even cover half of my monthly student loan payments. The jig was up.
All told, I came out of college with about $45,000 in student loan debt and almost $15,000 in credit card debt. I hadn’t even lived on campus; I commuted from home; my parents paid for some of my tuition; and I only went to a mediocre school. How the hell was this possible?
All of a sudden Sallie Mae and the credit card companies didn’t seem so lovely anymore. There was one thought that kept repeating over & over in my head: Why didn’t anyone warn me? I felt cheated, betrayed, angry, afraid, and helpless. I wondered what the people in the financial aid office had been doing all that time. I wondered why my high school guidance counselor didn’t press me harder about applying for scholarships or grants. I wondered a lot of things, but mostly I wondered how the hell I was going to get out of the mess.
I started sending out resumes for jobs with starting salaries that would at least cover my monthly student loan payments. I sent out resume after resume but before long, I realized another harsh reality. That Bachelor’s Degree in English with a Creative Writing Focus wasn’t so great either. Nobody was calling me back. I couldn’t even get an interview.
The clock was ticking. I was halfway through my grace period. Then one day, one of my best friends mentioned an opening in her office. I looked over the job description and realized that it had nothing to do with what I’d gone to school for. I didn’t even know what it actually was, but the starting salary was more than what I needed. The rest was history.
I’ve been at my current company for almost three years now. And yesterday I paid off my last remaining credit card balance! Additionally over these few years, I’ve cut my student loan debt almost in half and by next Winter, I will have it down to a quarter of what I started with.
Stay tuned for tomorrow’s post, where I will share how I am doing it and how you can do it, too.
I love these three lines so much that I put them on my desktop:
We can choose to be popular, or we can choose to honor our spirits.We can choose to make other people happy, or we can choose to make ourselves happy.We can choose to say what people want to hear, or we can choose to speak our truths.
Great post. 🙂
Thank you, Lisa. So happy to know that this resonated with you. <3
Dena, that’s a tough one. One of the automatic behaviors of people is to be loved and to be recognised. It’s one of our basic needs. So speaking our truths and being unpopular is against our nature (at least to a certain extent). Having said that, I do believe that it makes you stronger as a person if you are consciously unpopular. You are not one of the sheeps in the hurd, life’s too short for that. Your post reminded me to speak my truth more often, that will indeed make me a more happy person.
Thanks!
To love and be loved–oh yes! I think that a part of what makes all of this so easy for me is being surrounded by unconditional love. My family & my fiance are huge sources of bounding love in my life. That love acts as a cushion that enables me to be brave in the face of the rest of the world.
Hey, today’s “popular” is tomorrow’s “shunned”….so, being true to yourself is the way to go.
Exactly–just like fashion!!
Thanks for your words this morning girl…it’s not the easy way to go but it’s being true, and damn friends/family/loved ones—they sure don’t like hearing the truth. “She was beautiful, but she was beautiful in the way a fire forest is beautiful…” just awesome!
I love you, Cindy! That you for your support, always.
I’ve read no better homage to being oneself than this post.
Thank you, lovely. xo
Serendipity at work again here. Last week I created an art journal page “Let your freak flag fly”
Can you tell me what book that Neil Gaiman quote is from?thanks
snailgrrl.blogspot.com
Serendipity. 🙂 Unfortunately, I don’t know which book it is from. A friend posted it awhile ago and it stuck to my heart like glue.
That is a supremely powerful statement… I’ve struggled with this as well because I’ve always been the kind of person who wants to be liked by everyone! But I’ve realized that I can’t do that and expect to be completely true to who I am.
There will ALWAYS be people who don’t like us, for whatever reason. Sometimes their dislike is not even rational. We have to be able to accept this, or we’ll drive ourselves insane! Thanks for reminding me.
Also, it’s so crazy that you shared a quote by Neil Gaiman. I literally just discovered a quote of his that I love (unrelated to this topic, but figured I’d share it in case you hadn’t heard it):
❝Everybody has a secret world inside of them. All of the people of the
world, I mean everybody. No matter how dull and boring they are on the
outside, inside them they’ve all got unimaginable, magnificent,
wonderful, stupid, amazing worlds. Not just one world. Hundreds of them.
Thousands maybe.❞
Hope you have a wonderful day, Dena J! :]
Thanks so much, Allyssa! I hope that 2012 has been beautiful for you so far.
I love what you’ve shared here. I resonate so much with that last paragraph: “In willing to be unpopular, in embracing my own uniqueness, I find the
purest form of freedom that I’ve ever known. That this is me—good &
bad; terrible & beautiful—that I am constantly evolving, open to
change, yearning to learn—that I accept myself and the rest of the world
is welcome to do the same or to walk away. This is my pure freedom.
It’s what gets me high these days.”
I don’t make sense in the way that typical bloggers do, and I’m okay with that. Those are not my people. I revealed my heart and soul in my new about page, and I feel so *liberated*, so much *more whole* and filled with *love* for myself, for those who resonate with my core, and for the Universe for allowing this to take place.
I truly believe each and every person has an amazing story to share, if only they were given the time, space, and compassion to tell it.
You are wonderful, Lynn. I am so grateful that we’ve met. I look forward to exploring your work. <3
This reminds me of our discussion of your career in the choir / chorus!!! And how our friendship has evolved, where we have come from. A huge part of that has been our honesty with one another… a willingness to endure temporary discomfort for the sake of lifelong respect. Or so I hope!