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How to Beat Self-Doubt & Accomplish Anything


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When I decided to start this blog last winter, I had doubts. Many automatic negative thoughts rushed through my mind:

  • With all of the blogs out there, why would anyone want to read mine?
  • Why should anyone care what I have to say?
  • There are so many talented bloggers, what right do I have to try and compete?

The truth is that those thoughts are completely normal. As emotional, thinking creatures that is what human beings do. We doubt ourselves. Of course people fall all over the spectrum from super-confident to incredibly low self-esteems; but even the most arrogant people experience occasional feelings of self-doubt. It is how we deal with those feelings of self-doubt that determines how successful we are and how much we can accomplish in our lives.

Having been a practitioner of CBT for many years, I try to replace my negative thoughts with positive ones always. When it came to starting my blog, my thoughts were fairly rational, but they were also very negative. I needed to replace those thoughts with positive ones. Luckily with practice and time it has become easy for me to do:

  • It doesn’t matter how many blogs there are out there, my voice is unique.
  • Some people will like what I write, others may not, but even if I can touch one life, it will be worth it to me.
  • My goal is to help people, not to compete with other bloggers for the spotlight.

I started this blog because I am passionate about helping people. I did not let negative thoughts or self-doubt get in the way. By replacing negative thoughts and self-doubt with positive thoughts and self-assurance you can beat your insecurities and accomplish your goals every single time.

What One Man Can Do, Another Can Also Do

I have been with my partner for just over two years. His can-do attitude constantly inspires me. Last December we moved into a major fixer-upper (also known as a “handyman’s special”) on the edge of a state forest. The house was in complete disrepair. It would have intimidated even the most experienced of carpenters and handymen. But he rarely gets intimidated or overwhelmed. Over the last year he has tackled areas of the house, piece by piece. Slowly but surely we see improvement. In August, some electric work needed to be done. My reaction was obvious to me, call an electrician, but he responded that he was going to do it himself. This scared me. Electric work is serious and if something goes wrong it is potentially dangerous. Even with the state the house was in — I didn’t want it to burn down! Still, he was confident as he usually is. His response is always the same, “What one man can do, another can also do.” He read a how-to electric book and the electric got done.

What one man can do, another can also do. The idea is simple, but it is also revolutionary. It was this idea that gave me the final push to start this blog. I scanned through all of my favorite blogs — Gala Darling’s, Tim Brownson’s, Paulo Coelho’s… — and I thought, these are just people! These are human beings just like me! I can do what they are doing. And then, I went ahead and I did it. It’s really and truly that simple.

Yes, I experience challenges just like everyone else. I work 40+ hours a week at an association. That tends to get in the way of updating, but hey, I roll with the punches. I update when I can. Maybe I am making a small difference in many people’s lives. Maybe I am making a large difference in few people’s lives. The point is that I am transforming lives! How incredible is that? And maybe one day this blog will take off. Maybe one day I can quit my 9 to 5 and blog full-time. Right now this is my path. This is the the road that the Universe has led me to. I am grateful for it and I am living my dream to help and inspire others.

You Can Achieve Anything That You Put Your Mind To
I am living proof that nothing is impossible and so are you. In my lifetime I have done things that I never thought I could do and that other people told me I never could do. I spent 3 weeks in Kenya. I lost 70 pounds. I overcame severe anxiety and depression. I asked my boss for an $11,000 raise. I started a self-improvement blog and I am helping to change people’s lives!

“The more you lose yourself in something bigger than yourself, the more energy you will have.” —Norman Vincent Peale

I could have stopped at any point. I could have let fear and irrational, negative thoughts get in my way — but I didn’t. I kept pushing forward. I believed in myself. I promise that you are capable of doing the same.

What is your goal? What is the thing that you want to accomplish most in your life? Think about it and then get to work.

  • Practice Visualization.
  • Surround yourself with people that will encourage and inspire you.
  • Remind yourself that “What one man can do, another can also do.”
  • Live & breathe your goals.
  • Believe in yourself.
  • Replace all of your negative, irrational thoughts with positive rational ones (CBT).
  • Do not let anything get in your way.
  • Remember that failures & mistakes are just bumps in the road to success. Don’t ever give up.

“It’s not what we do once in a while that shapes our lives, but what we do consistently.” —Anthony Robbins

Success Is Yours for the Taking
You have no idea how powerful your mind really is and how able you truly are. There is nothing that you can not do. Stop the pity party today. Stop the excuses. Throw your fears out the window.

“As a rule, men worry more about what they can’t see than about what they can.” —Julius Caesar

Accomplishing a goal can be as simple as learning how to do the electric in your house or as complicated as traveling the world in 3 months. The point is that no matter what it is — if you believe that you can do it, you will do it. I am here rooting you on and the Universe is conspiring with you, on your side, always.

If you want to know more about how I achieved any of my personal goals, ask! If there is anything that I can do to help you reach yours, let me know!

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  • · · · ·

    Review: The Power of Now

    The Power of Now had been on my “to-read” list for years when, by a stroke of fate, a dear friend offered to lend me her audio copy. Based on my general understanding of the book and its content (prior to reading it) I felt that I would enjoy it; however, I was completely unprepared for the way that the book would speak to me, transform my perspective, and change my life.

    The Unreal Past & Future

    In The Power of Now, we learn that to live in the future or the past is to suffer. The only way to exist in true harmony is to live in the now. After all, the past is not real, the future is not real. The past and the future only exist in our minds.

    When I first heard this concept I refused to believe or comprehend it. Of course my past is real, I thought. Of course my future is real, too. How dare someone suggest that it is not? My ego lashed out; but then I thought more about it. I listened, opened my mind, and realized that it was true. I am going to ask you to walk through an exercise with me to help you understand.

    Let’s recall a memory in which you are eating something. Let’s say, for example, it’s a hot summer day and you’re licking an ice cream cone. Now, where ever you are—right now, present moment, not in the memory—I’d like you to stick your finger right into the ice cream and then throw it to the floor. Can you do that? Can you touch that ice cream cone from your memory? No, of course you can’t (unless you’re on hallucinogenics but that’s another story).

    The fact is that right now you can not touch that ice cream cone and therefore it is not real. It may seem real in your memory—in your mind—but it is not really “real”…not here, not now, not in existence. It is only a memory and it only exists in your mind.

    This principle is also true for the future. Imagine any future scenario in your mind. You win the lottery. You get fired from your job. You purchase a house. You fall off of a cliff. You can play each of those scenes out in your head. You can fill in as much detail as you like. You can mentally experience the future, but the truth remains that the future scenario isn’t “real”. You can’t actually reach out and touch anything in the future right now. The future only exists in your mind.

    When I finally grasped this concept I was shocked & amazed. It seems simple, but somehow I had been missing it for my entire life! To me, the past and the future were as real as the present. The past happened to me. The future was going to happen to me. I held on to these concepts for dear life. But then I realized the truth… the past and the present are not that important. They’re not even real. They are only in my head.

    You might be feeling a bit angry right now. (I know because I was at this point.) You might be thinking, How dare you claim that my past is not real? I’ve suffered, I’ve lived, I’ve triumphed, I’ve done X, Y, and Z. And my future, that is real too! I am going to do things 1, 2, 3, and so on!

    Your Ego Feeds on the Past & Future

    Well, my friend, I am not sorry to break it to you. That voice of anger is fueled by fear and the fear is coming from your ego.

    For your entire life, your ego has been calling the shots. He rules you by fear—fear over your past and fear over your future. So long as you believe in the reality of your past and your future, your ego has control over you. It uses every thing that ever happened in the past against you. It uses everything that you hope to happen in the future against you.

    There is only one way to overcome your ego and that is to live completely in the now. Let go of the past and the future. Be fully present in this moment.

    It is not easy. You’ve spent your entire life ruled by your ego, living in the past and present. But while it’s not easy, it is possible. It’s entirely possible for you to begin living entirely in the present moment, entirely in peace, love, & light, entirely free from the chains of your ego.

    The Power of Now is an excellent book and if you truly listen to every word and practice its teachings in your daily life, you will succeed. It has been quite a journey for me already and I’ve only been on it for a few weeks now! I am experiencing life in ways that I never dreamed possible. You can do it, too.

    *********

    Here are some of my favourite pieces from The Power of Now along with my interpretations of each.

    You have it already. You just can’t feel it because your mind is making too much noise.
    Eckhart Tolle tells us that that many people ask him to “give” them his gift. His response is always the same, You already have it.

    This is entirely true. Each of us already has the immense power of now within. Tolle nor anyone else can “give” that to us—but what he can do (and does in the book) is to show you how to harness the power in your own life.

    Not to be able to stop thinking is a dreadful affliction; but we don’t realize it because almost everyone is suffering from it. So, it is considered normal.
    After reading (listening to) The Power of Now, I realized that yes, the modern human being is suffering from a debilitating disease: compulsive over thinking.

    It is so obvious to me now! How many millions of people are suffering from anxiety, depression, and so on? Most of these individuals are suffering as such simply because of compulsive over thinking.

    When we stop our compulsive, ego-driven thoughts, we live in harmony. Sadly, however, most people just don’t know how to stop those thoughts.

    We must become the silent observer, as Tolle describes in the book. The first step to overcoming the compulsive thoughts is to recognize them, to be the silent observer of your mind.

    To see, but not see. To hear, but not hear.
    Have you ever had a moment, an hour, or a day where you were entirely mindless?

    For example, you are driving along the road completely spaced out from reality and suddenly you “wake up” and you don’t know where your head has been for some stretch of time. You know that you must have been seeing and aware, because you didn’t crash your vehicle. But you weren’t really there. You were seeing but not seeing.

    Another example, you are in conversation with a friend or loved one and you begin zoning out. You hear words coming out of her mouth, but when she finally stops talking, you realize that you have no idea what she just said. You were listening, but you weren’t really there. You were hearing but not hearing.

    This is what it means to see, but not see; to hear, but not hear. It is living life in an unconscious state, on autopilot. Most likely you are daydreaming about the unreal past or future. You can overcome this state of nothingness and time wasting by harnessing the power of now and being fully present in each moment.

    Humanity is under great pressure to evolve because it is the only chance for the survival of our species.
    “Humanity is under great pressure to evolve because it is our only chance of survival as a race. This will affect every aspect of your life and close relationships in particular. Never before have relationships been as problematic and conflict ridden as they are now. As you may continue to pursue the goal of salvation through a relationship, you will be disillusioned again and again. But if you accept that the relationship is here to make you conscious instead of happy, then the relationship will offer you salvation, and you will be aligning yourself with the higher consciousness that wants to be born into this world. For those who hold to the old patterns, there will be increasing pain, violence, confusion, and madness.”

    *********

    I could write ten posts about The Power of Now and I would only begin to scratch the surface. The book is extremely intensive. Tolle’s language is thick and weighted with meaning. The content is formatted as question and answer for the sake of clarity—but it is still heavy reading. As I mentioned earlier, I listened to the audio book and I would highly recommend this format. I have heard that reading the text can be confusing and I can understand why.

    The audio book does span several hours, but it is entirely worth every moment. If you can not afford to buy the audio book, you should consider borrowing it from your local library.

    If you decide to read or have read this book, I would love to hear your thoughts. Whether or not you decide to, I hope that you will consider the ideas that I have shared in this post.

    Thinking about being somewhere else uses up your precious, present moments. Be here now. —Wayne Dyer

14 Comments

  1. I love, love, love this! It's timely, posts of truth like this that always fuel me. Simple but effective. These are the very same things I have used over the past year to literally transform my life from NOT working to exceptional. And it's just the beginning! Bravo!

  2. Dena –

    "You have no idea how powerful your mind really is and how able you truly are. There is nothing that you can not do. Stop the pity party today. Stop the excuses. Throw your fears out the window."

    To think of how much time we waste wondering if we have what it takes instead of just getting started…how much can we accomplish if we "stop the pity party," and get moving?

    Paul

  3. I love that exact same sentence that Paul quotes above.. "throw your fears out the window." Once again, I can totally relate to your topic of choice. So weird that you and Paul wrote very similar articles at the same time. It makes me want to take a stab on this topic as well… something that everyone can relate to. And certainly me!
    🙂
    Karen

  4. @Eli – That is really amazing. I am so excited to hear that you are on a journey to transform your own life. Keep up the amazing work. I am cheering for you!

    @Paul – You've hit the nail on the head. It's not always about thinking. Sometimes it's about DOING! I mean that is how things get done. Right? 😉

    @Karen – Thanks, love. I'll look forward to reading it if you do.

  5. @Karim – I am so glad that you have found this post thoughtful! Best of luck to you on your self improvement journey. Cheers!

  6. i genuinely adore all your writing type, very helpful.
    don’t quit and also keep writing simply because it simply just truly worth to read it,
    impatient to read way more of your current stories, have a pleasant day!

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