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If you cannot put your heart into it, take yourself out of it.

evolutionyou.net | Lead with Heart

Einstein said that the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, and expecting different results. I agree. Fact: Most people are insane. The cure for this insanity is awareness. (In fact, awareness is the cure for most things.)

There is a pattern among living things—we do what we know. In the morning my cat wails like a wounded baby until I give her attention. The vines on my cucumber plant pull themselves toward the sun. I worry about everything.

None of us creatures take note of what we are doing. Even if we’re not getting the results we’re after. Even if it’s making us miserable. Even if we’re doing the same thing over and over and getting nowhere. We just do it because it’s what we know.

Living things require a catalyst for change. The catalyst can be trial and error, evolution, or necessity. Examples:

  1. If my cat scratches at my door for twenty minutes and I ignore her, eventually she will try something else.
  2. Animals evolve over time to better adapt to their environment. The Hudson river has become so toxic that the small fish that inhabit it have grown immune to the toxicity. Moreover, in the past decade they’ve actually evolved to thrive on that toxicity.
  3. The natural habitat of black bears in New Jersey has been almost entirely destroyed. There is little left for them to eat, less fish, less plant life, etc. To avoid starving, they’ve become scavengers. We can’t leave our garbage out overnight.
  4. Our cucumber plants crave sunlight. If we put a potted plant half in the shade, half in the sun, the plant will literally pull itself into the light.

But there is a difference—something that separates us (humans) from the rest of the living things. That difference is awareness. We are not doomed to the fate of the cat, the fish, the bear, the cucumber plant. If we practice awareness we can create positive change in our lives without impetus, without a catalyst. We can observe the world around us, the things that happen to us, and we can knowingly, willfully alter our paths.

We do not have to wait until it’s necessary, until there is no other choice, until we are miserable, unhealthy, afraid, and desperate. We can create positive change now.

What is it for you? What are you doing over and over again, even though you are craving a different result?

The answer that you’ve been searching for is not so far away. The result that you’ve been hoping for is actually within reach. The key to all of this is simple. Live with your heart. Lead with your heart. If you cannot put your heart into it, then take yourself out of it.

The soul is a tiny thing that brings us peace and joy when we let it swim/fly. —Mark Nepa

Stop doing things that you hate to make other people happy. Stop sabotaging your dreams because you are afraid of failure. Stop making excuses and avoiding the hard work that will make your goals a reality. Stop worrying. Stop the insanity of doing the same thing over and over again, and expecting different results.

Today is the day. It’s the only day that matters.

In love & light,
Dena

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  • · · ·

    3 Super Simple Ways to Reduce Stress, Improve Health, & Live Happy

    Want to know how you can cut your stress in half?

    How about if there were two things you could change that would drastically alter your stress levels for the rest of your life?

    Now I bet you really want to know, right?

    What if I told you that doing these simple things will not only decrease your stress levels, but will also make you happier and decrease your risk of heart attack, ulcers, & high blood pressure?

    Ready for this? Four words: Stop Rushing, Take Vacation.

    Yes, that’s it. It’s really quite simple, but the results that you will see if you make these changes will amaze you.

    The Problems
    So why is rushing & a lack of vacation such a huge problem? Well, rushing every now and then wouldn’t really be such a problem. But in today’s society, the reality is that we don’t just rush every now and then. We rush all of the time.

    We are constantly hurrying from one thing to the next, multitasking, with our minds in five different places at once. We browse the Web in multiple Windows. We watch television while surfing the Web. We talk on our house phones while texting on our cell phones/iPhones/Blackberrys. While we’re driving to work, we’re planning our days, who we’ll see at each meeting, and what we’re having for dinner. While we’re eating dinner, we’re checking our email, responding to emails, and thinking about what’s on TV that night. While we’re watching TV that night, we’re thinking about everything we’ve got to do tomorrow. You get the picture…

    The Facts
    The United States is one of (if not the) most stressful, fast-paced, uptight societies in existence. The “American way” of rush, rush, rush has huge negative implications. And sadly, the rest of the world is beginning to follow suit. It’s not a good path to be on.

    Here are some statistics about minimum vacation days around the world:

    Austria — 35 days
    Brazil — 30 days
    Finland — 35 days
    Sweden — 32 days
    Ukraine — 24 days
    United States — 7 days
    (Source: http://nationmaster.com)

    7 days? Really? WTF United States!?!?!?

    Every year Expedia.com launches an intense Vacation Deprivation survey to gather the facts & the effects of American Vacation Deprivation.

    Check out these stats:

    Notice that despite earning the least amount of annual vacation days, Americans will still leave an average of 3 days unused! This goes to show that so many Americans don’t even use the little vacation time that they get! Not good.

    Why is Vacation So Important?
    Let’s talk about mental health.

    • 34% of Americans say they come back from vacation feeling better about their jobs and are even more productive.
    • 53% of employed U.S. adults say they come back feeling rested and rejuvenated after vacation.
    • 53% of employed U.S. adults say they come back feeling reconnected with family after vacation.

    It’s no big secret that work can be stressful. Even if you absolutely adore your career, you still have the occasional (or frequent) challenging day. If you refuse to take a breather every now & then, you are putting your mental health and your relationships at risk.

    Obesity, heart disease, high blood pressure, ulcers, anxiety, depression, and so on are all symptoms of stress. Stress causes cortisol to build up in your body, the cortisol is then stored as dangerous fat. In addition to all of the physical symptoms of stress, there is the issue of rushing around. When you are rushing nonstop from place to place, it’s easy to stop for fast-food because you don’t make the time to cook nutritious meals for yourself and your family.

    If you look at the rates of obesity around the globe, you probably won’t be shocked to see where the United States fits in.

    That’s right, numero uno. Not a good place to be in this case. Americans are the most obese individuals in the world. A sad fact to note considering that we are also some of the richest people, with some of the most vast & diverse availability to nutritious & wholesome food. (Please watch Food, Inc. for more information on this topic.)

    Turning the Tide
    The facts are straightforward. Constant rushing & vacation deprivation will cause you harm. Here are 3 super simple ways that you can combat these harmful habits.

    1. Practice efficient time management. Keep a calendar and don’t overbook yourself, no exceptions. We all have a ton of stuff that we want to get done, but we have to prioritize. Choose the tasks that mean the most to you and will provide you with the best ROI (return on investment). Don’t commit to anything that doesn’t benefit you, your career, your family, or your friends in a big way. Your time is precious and you should treat it as such.

    2. Use your vacation time, all of it. No matter how many days that your company allots for vacation, make sure and use it. If your company tends to be on the real stingy side with vacation, don’t be afraid to set a confidential meeting with your HR director to point out the importance of sufficient vacation time. Sufficient vacation time is mutually beneficial — you will feel better and thereby, your performance will improve. Win – Win!

    Likewise, if you work for yourself, make sure to pencil in enough time for R & R.

    3. Breathe. When you are rushing, you are most likely breathing shallow. Shallow breathing causes rapid heart rate & conversely, deep breathing causes a slower heart rate. Take time to observe your breathing throughout the day. If you find yourself shallow breathing, take a deep breath in through your nostrils. Let the air flow through your chest & deep into the pit of your stomach. Allow your stomach to expand, like a balloon, as it fills with air. Then slowly exhale through your nose and expel all of the air from your body. Breathe in deeply again, allowing the air to fill your stomach as before. Each time you inhale, take in the positive energy & light around you. Let it fill & calm your soul. Each time you exhale, push out your negative energy & fear. Continue to do this until you feel calm.

    * — * — * — * — *

    Slow down, be in the now.

9 Comments

  1. I’m trying to be more like the cucumber… forever crawling towards the sun.

    I like that.

    And you’re right. Lead with your heart, because today is the day that matters.

    1. Forever crawling towards the sun…

      This is a life well-lived, my friend. Pursuit of happiness, pursuit of light. What else is there? 🙂

  2. It’s like animals and bugs and even vines have this consciousness and brilliant adaptability. I know it’s called “survival”–but I think there is some clear-clean phototropic awareness. We are saturated in self-awareness and it keeps us in puddles of mud.

    I am wholly there when you realize you don’t have to go to rock-bottom to re-boot your awareness. My decision to stop drinking (1yr ago), was a quiet, calm choice. It was a wonderful, whisper–“enjoy the clarity and the tummy of life without beer.” Done. Awareness. Happy.

    Bzzzz,
    M

    1. Brilliant, Mark. Yes–clear-clean phototropic. Perhaps a total lack of awareness? The essence of not knowing (not worrying, not trying) and just being. That nature has the ability to just be, like water. Maybe to embrace awareness is, in actuality, to let it all go? ♥

  3. I like to think that I use my heart in everything I do. Some say it can get me in trouble becasue I am too quick to use my heart. I think it’s led me in the right direction and those logical mind oriented people can bug off. 🙂 Love it Dena and love you!! 🙂

    1. I struggle with it all of the time, Meg. I lead with my heart, as well. So much so that at times I feel like it’s dragging me around–up, down, through the mud. Ya know? This morning, in my person journal, I posed a question. I wondered, “Would my life be easier if I could just stop feeling so much?” And then I answered myself. “Yes. It would. But it would also be more boring and less brilliant.”

      Love you so much! xo

  4. Following the heart is a scary business. I know, because I am in the midst of it. It doesn’t come without some lost sleep and worry, but I know I am on the right path.

    And, I know it will take me where I want to go.

    xo

    1. A scary business indeed. I know all about the lost sleep aspect of it — it picked me up at 3:30 a.m. last night & never put me down. But, like you, I know that it’s worth it.

      We’re exactly where we need to be. Love you so much. xo

  5. Funny I just read a fortune from a fortune cookie:)Its says:
    Life is a tragedy for those who feel,and a comedy for those who think….
    I find it amusing because i am such a feeler,however I am also a thinker…
    So that must be the balance,to have a little of both….
    I find myself aware of the imbalance of my nature,and the continual repeating the same behaviors,I am aware that it gets me no where,and yet i keep hoping for some change..I am aware i could do something different,however I am not aware of what makes my heart happy,besides Love….I have my childrens,and that of my husband,so he says….thats is my sadness…he says,but yet i don’t feel it…there is no show of affection,and that is what drives me crazy….its the same over and over,no new results…so,how do I pull out of something that keeps me half way there?

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