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Cut the Fat, Transform Your Life

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Chaos, sloth, toxicity, greed, gluttony, rage, envy. How often do you experience feelings like this? If the answer is anything but rarely or never, then you need to consider altering your lifestyle.

The reality is that in today’s world there are endless opportunities to feel bad. We’ve got climate issues, population issues, crime issues, financial issues. The list goes on. If you are not satisfied with complaining about the problems that you do have, you can always get upset about the things that you don’t have. Just turn on the TV. It will remind you that you don’t have a supermodel wife. You don’t have a fleet of $90,000 cars in your driveway. You don’t have the money to take your dream vacation to Fiji. This list goes on, too. In fact, if you really want to be miserable, my friend Tim has got a whole post about how to do it at his blog The Discomfort Zone.

But, this post is not about being miserable. This post is actually about being happy. It is about taking all of the crap that makes you miserable and cutting it out of your life. The process is a lot more simple than you might think. And more importantly, I guarantee that if you make these changes today, you will be happier tomorrow. All you’ve got to do is cut the fat.

Surroundings
You’ve probably been hearing this everywhere lately. The concept is huge, the results are life-changing. It’s all about minimalism. Simply put, minimalism means cutting out the excess in your life. Your surroundings are a great place to start.

You are sitting at your desk about to start a very important project (a painting, a novel, a proposal, an estimate, anything really). Now imagine two scenarios:

In the first scenario your desk is a mess. There are papers everywhere. You have sloppy notes scribbled on everything. There is a stinky banana peel to your left. There is a half drank can of cola to your right. The trash bucket is overflowing at your feet. You are so distracted by the mess that you can’t even think straight.

In the second scenario your desk is immaculate. You have only the items that you need in front of you. Everything is organized. The air in the room is fresh. You have a clean slate. Your creative juices begin to flow.

In which of these two scenarios are you going to be more productive? In which case do you have a better chance of completing your task and reaching your goal? Of course it is the second scenario. In the same way that minimalism improves your ability to work at your desk, it can improve the overall quality of your life.

Home is where the heart is but it’s also where the junk is. The first step to creating harmony in your living space is to get rid of the stuff that you don’t need. Start slow. Work through one room at a time. Take inventory of your possessions. What items are just taking up space? Is there a sofa that has been covered in boxes for the last six months? Is there a broken television that hasn’t been switched on since the late 90’s? If you have things that you do not use on a regular basis (at least once every few months) get rid of them or put them in storage. It is not healthy to be surrounded by things that you do not need or use. Those items can literally drain you of energy and positivity simply by their unnecessary presence.

If you have things that you are guilty about getting rid of, give them to friends, donate them to a charity, or have a yard sale. One man’s trash is another man’s treasure — but first you’ve got to get rid of that trash and let it become another man’s treasure.

Your home should be your sanctuary. You should be surrounded by things that make you feel calm, tranquil, productive, and happy. Once you have conquered your home, move on to your car, your yard, your office at work. Keep going. Practice minimalism everywhere that you exist and the joy of your existence will multiply.

People & Places
Are there vampires in your life? You know what I’m talking about — the people and the places that suck the life out of you everyday. How can you stop it? How can you kill the vampires? Just cut the fat.

Okay, I know that it is not always easy to end relationships. Sometimes there are people in our lives — friends, lovers, even family members — that have been slowly killing us with their toxicity for years. It is not easy to let go of them. It is not easy to cut them out of your life. But, if you want to change your life, if you want to experience joy on a level that you did not think possible, you have to do it, even if it just means limiting contact.

“If someone is not treating you with love and respect, it is a gift they walk away from you. If that person doesn’t walk away, you will surely endure years of suffering with him or her. Walking away may hurt for awhile, but your heart will eventually heal.” —Don Miguel Ruiz

In the same way that people will drag you down, places will too. If every time you stop at the corner bar you end up with a hangover from hell the next day, stop going. If every time you eat lunch at the diner up the street you get bloated for five days, stop going. If every time you spend the afternoon at the shopping mall you max out your credit card, stop going.

This is a simple concept but for some reason (usually guilt or fear) we fail to grasp it. If you do not spend time with that toxic person, that toxic person can not hurt you. If you do not visit that toxic place, that toxic place can not hurt you.

Possessions & Consumerism
Like I mentioned at the beginning of this article, if you turn on the TV you’ve got a whole bunch of reasons why your life sucks. But what if you didn’t? What if you actually didn’t turn on the TV? What if you didn’t have to see the stick thin models, the women being overtly sexualized, the luxury car commercials that make you believe that you need to spend $50,000 to get from Point A to Point B? What if you picked up a book that taught you that you are beautiful exactly as you are? What if you read an article that taught you that this society will chew you up and spit you out if you let it? What if you really stopped buying into all of the marketing B.S.? What if you understood that there is nothing outside of you (no car, no fitness equipment, no jewelry, nothing) that will make you happy? What if you finally realized that you can not seek happiness, you must live it?

Two years ago, I was swimming in credit card debt. One time I paid over $300 for a pair of Gucci sunglasses that were scratched and bent within a matter of weeks. When I think back on that lifestyle, my stomach turns. In December of 2008 I moved into a small house bordered by a state forest. Slowly, I started getting rid of my material poss
essions. I subscribed to Netflix. I downgraded to basic cable and stopped watching TV except for Discovery and the news every now and then. No longer do I turn on the television and lust after the hottest trends. I wear the clothes that I have in my closet. I recognize that my beauty exists within me and within the good that I put out into this world. I have never been happier and I have never been more free. I want you to experience this joy. I hope that this post starts you on this journey. Let me know how I can help you get there!

“It’s not what we do once in a while that shapes our lives, but what we do consistently.” —Anthony Robbins

Cutting the fat, and the toxicity, from your life will be a slow process. Have patience, remain strong, and stay focused. Remember that the universe is conspiring with you and so am I.

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    My Journey to Financial Freedom | Part 1: The Fall

    Three years ago, I was nearly $60,000 in debt. I had a Bachelor’s degree that didn’t appear to be worth its weight in salt and a job that couldn’t cover a fraction of my monthly bills. I was terrified.

    Today, I am closer to complete financial freedom than I ever dreamed possible. Last week, I paid off my last remaining credit card balance. This two-part post is a celebration of this incredible milestone in my journey.

    In part one, I will explain how I got to that terrible place. In part two, I will explain how I’m getting out of it (and how you can do it, too).

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    A financial prison is the worst sort of prison to be stuck in. A financial prison does not have steel bars or a prison warden. You will not get sent to financial prison for committing a crime. There is only one person that can sentence you to financial prison. That person is you.

    There are two primary types of financial prisoners:

    1. There are those in financial prison who got there because they truly did not know any better. This type eventually realizes the error of their ways and breaks free.

    2. There are those who knowingly commit themselves to financial prison. This type is well aware of the consequences of living beyond her means; but she does it anyway.

    Of course there are also those who fall somewhere in the middle, like me… (Cue dream sequence.) It all started when I was 18. The guidance counseling systems in my high school and college were either completely inadequate or I simply refused to pay attention. I can’t honestly remember which it was, though I think it was the former. Either way, I was screwed.

    Before me, no one in my family had ever been to college so I didn’t receive much advice. I was thrilled to be out of high school and ready for the next step. I took my SATs one time and applied to one school. My parents, being average folks, made just enough money to prevent me from receiving financial aid; but not enough money to be able to pay my full tuition. For me, this meant loans: “lovely” student loans from “lovely” Sallie Mae.

    My mother co-signed and it was a cinch from there. Each semester I filled out a relatively simple form and like magic, Sallie Mae sent me a check. In fact, Sallie Mae was so generous that they allowed me to take out as much “extra” money as I needed every semester. It was fantastic! Yes, I had money to pay for books, meals, and extra curricula. I also had money to go out and binge drink, buy clothes I didn’t need, designer purses, and more. Sallie Mae was wonderful to me. And the best part if it was that there was no need for discussion. No one guided me, no one advised me, and no one asked me any questions. I showed up at the financial aid office a couple of times each year and it was always smooth sailing.

    On top of that, another great thing happened when I was 18! The credit card companies started to send me applications. And that was just as easy. I got one and then another and then another. Whatever I couldn’t cover with those pretty little checks from Sallie Mae, I could simply charge on my credit cards. College was good to me. I joined a sorority, I partied hard, I shopped until I dropped. What more could a girl ask for?

    It wasn’t all fun & games though. I worked through college. I worked at a children’s camp each summer; I was a Spanish teacher for two years; and toward the end of my college career I was a bookseller at Borders bookstore. All of the money I made working was spending money for me. I had Sallie Mae and the credit cards to pay all of my “real” bills.

    When I finally graduated, I was making a cool $8.25 an hour at Borders. I loved it. I was happy… until one day, out of no where, a letter came in the mail. I had a six month grace period and then I would have to start paying back those loans. My paychecks barely covered my minimum credit card payments. How was I going to make loan payments on top of that?

    So I sat down and did something that I’d never done before. I wrote up a budget. It was horrifying when I realized that even if I’d had no other bills, my monthly wages from Borders wouldn’t even cover half of my monthly student loan payments. The jig was up.

    All told, I came out of college with about $45,000 in student loan debt and almost $15,000 in credit card debt. I hadn’t even lived on campus; I commuted from home; my parents paid for some of my tuition; and I only went to a mediocre school. How the hell was this possible?

    All of a sudden Sallie Mae and the credit card companies didn’t seem so lovely anymore. There was one thought that kept repeating over & over in my head: Why didn’t anyone warn me? I felt cheated, betrayed, angry, afraid, and helpless. I wondered what the people in the financial aid office had been doing all that time. I wondered why my high school guidance counselor didn’t press me harder about applying for scholarships or grants. I wondered a lot of things, but mostly I wondered how the hell I was going to get out of the mess.

    I started sending out resumes for jobs with starting salaries that would at least cover my monthly student loan payments. I sent out resume after resume but before long, I realized another harsh reality. That Bachelor’s Degree in English with a Creative Writing Focus wasn’t so great either. Nobody was calling me back. I couldn’t even get an interview.

    The clock was ticking. I was halfway through my grace period. Then one day, one of my best friends mentioned an opening in her office. I looked over the job description and realized that it had nothing to do with what I’d gone to school for. I didn’t even know what it actually was, but the starting salary was more than what I needed. The rest was history.

    I’ve been at my current company for almost three years now. And yesterday I paid off my last remaining credit card balance! Additionally over these few years, I’ve cut my student loan debt almost in half and by next Winter, I will have it down to a quarter of what I started with.

    Stay tuned for tomorrow’s post, where I will share how I am doing it and how you can do it, too.

5 Comments

  1. Great… great great post. Absolutely agree and love your concepts… Your spot on… Keep up the good work…

  2. @Meandering Bohemian – Thank you so much for your kind words! It means so much to me that you enjoyed the post.

    @Laura – You know what, it doesn't matter when you did it. It only matters that you did it. I am so proud of you.

    @Josh – Thank you for your compliments. I intend to! 🙂

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