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Focusing Inward

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This morning I spent fifteen, divine, uninterrupted minutes stretching and meditating. It was the first time, I’d done so in… a year or more? I mean, I’ve stretched, but not like that. Not with complete quiet and no distractions and the most blissful silence you can imagine. Afterward, I felt like a new woman.

I’ve been dedicated to turning my focus inward and it’s working. I’ve even had two dates with girlfriends in the past week — sans baby. It feels wonderful to be rediscovering myself. I wore heels out to dinner last week, it was the first time I’d worn heels in nearly a year. I felt — dare I say it — sexy.

Somewhere in the midst of — fifty pounds of pregnancy weight and caring for a newborn and leaky boobs and days on end without showers and trying to feed a relentlessly messy eight-month-old — I truly lost hope that I would ever feel sexy again. But then there I was, sitting at the bar in heels, waiting for my girlfriend to join me for dinner, and that feeling that I’d thought was gone forever, was back.

I searched the drink menu for a drink that would be perfect for the occasion. I found it: The Love Martini, only I decided to call it The Self-Love Martini. Indeed, I am learning how to love myself again.

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That night we had the most wonderful, decadent fondue dinner. It was exactly what I needed to disconnect from the “Mommy” version of myself and reconnect with the other pieces of me, that had been too long neglected.

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In four months, I’ll be thirty-years-old. I’m starting the countdown. My subconscious mind tries to start the “there’s-so-much-that-I-should-have-accomplished-by-now” bullshit. But I catch it before it has a chance to go there. I have done so much. I have become so much. I want for thirty to be a celebration of the incredibly amazing & blessed life that I’ve lived so far. I also want for thirty to be a blank page, ripe with promise, ready for a thousand, new and magical adventures.

I feel lighter and more hopeful than I have in a long time. I’ve got some serious work to do in a whole bunch of areas. It’s all good though. I am going to keep putting one foot in front of the other. I am going to keep moving onward and focusing inward.

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    3 Super Simple Ways to Reduce Stress, Improve Health, & Live Happy

    Want to know how you can cut your stress in half?

    How about if there were two things you could change that would drastically alter your stress levels for the rest of your life?

    Now I bet you really want to know, right?

    What if I told you that doing these simple things will not only decrease your stress levels, but will also make you happier and decrease your risk of heart attack, ulcers, & high blood pressure?

    Ready for this? Four words: Stop Rushing, Take Vacation.

    Yes, that’s it. It’s really quite simple, but the results that you will see if you make these changes will amaze you.

    The Problems
    So why is rushing & a lack of vacation such a huge problem? Well, rushing every now and then wouldn’t really be such a problem. But in today’s society, the reality is that we don’t just rush every now and then. We rush all of the time.

    We are constantly hurrying from one thing to the next, multitasking, with our minds in five different places at once. We browse the Web in multiple Windows. We watch television while surfing the Web. We talk on our house phones while texting on our cell phones/iPhones/Blackberrys. While we’re driving to work, we’re planning our days, who we’ll see at each meeting, and what we’re having for dinner. While we’re eating dinner, we’re checking our email, responding to emails, and thinking about what’s on TV that night. While we’re watching TV that night, we’re thinking about everything we’ve got to do tomorrow. You get the picture…

    The Facts
    The United States is one of (if not the) most stressful, fast-paced, uptight societies in existence. The “American way” of rush, rush, rush has huge negative implications. And sadly, the rest of the world is beginning to follow suit. It’s not a good path to be on.

    Here are some statistics about minimum vacation days around the world:

    Austria — 35 days
    Brazil — 30 days
    Finland — 35 days
    Sweden — 32 days
    Ukraine — 24 days
    United States — 7 days
    (Source: http://nationmaster.com)

    7 days? Really? WTF United States!?!?!?

    Every year Expedia.com launches an intense Vacation Deprivation survey to gather the facts & the effects of American Vacation Deprivation.

    Check out these stats:

    Notice that despite earning the least amount of annual vacation days, Americans will still leave an average of 3 days unused! This goes to show that so many Americans don’t even use the little vacation time that they get! Not good.

    Why is Vacation So Important?
    Let’s talk about mental health.

    • 34% of Americans say they come back from vacation feeling better about their jobs and are even more productive.
    • 53% of employed U.S. adults say they come back feeling rested and rejuvenated after vacation.
    • 53% of employed U.S. adults say they come back feeling reconnected with family after vacation.

    It’s no big secret that work can be stressful. Even if you absolutely adore your career, you still have the occasional (or frequent) challenging day. If you refuse to take a breather every now & then, you are putting your mental health and your relationships at risk.

    Obesity, heart disease, high blood pressure, ulcers, anxiety, depression, and so on are all symptoms of stress. Stress causes cortisol to build up in your body, the cortisol is then stored as dangerous fat. In addition to all of the physical symptoms of stress, there is the issue of rushing around. When you are rushing nonstop from place to place, it’s easy to stop for fast-food because you don’t make the time to cook nutritious meals for yourself and your family.

    If you look at the rates of obesity around the globe, you probably won’t be shocked to see where the United States fits in.

    That’s right, numero uno. Not a good place to be in this case. Americans are the most obese individuals in the world. A sad fact to note considering that we are also some of the richest people, with some of the most vast & diverse availability to nutritious & wholesome food. (Please watch Food, Inc. for more information on this topic.)

    Turning the Tide
    The facts are straightforward. Constant rushing & vacation deprivation will cause you harm. Here are 3 super simple ways that you can combat these harmful habits.

    1. Practice efficient time management. Keep a calendar and don’t overbook yourself, no exceptions. We all have a ton of stuff that we want to get done, but we have to prioritize. Choose the tasks that mean the most to you and will provide you with the best ROI (return on investment). Don’t commit to anything that doesn’t benefit you, your career, your family, or your friends in a big way. Your time is precious and you should treat it as such.

    2. Use your vacation time, all of it. No matter how many days that your company allots for vacation, make sure and use it. If your company tends to be on the real stingy side with vacation, don’t be afraid to set a confidential meeting with your HR director to point out the importance of sufficient vacation time. Sufficient vacation time is mutually beneficial — you will feel better and thereby, your performance will improve. Win – Win!

    Likewise, if you work for yourself, make sure to pencil in enough time for R & R.

    3. Breathe. When you are rushing, you are most likely breathing shallow. Shallow breathing causes rapid heart rate & conversely, deep breathing causes a slower heart rate. Take time to observe your breathing throughout the day. If you find yourself shallow breathing, take a deep breath in through your nostrils. Let the air flow through your chest & deep into the pit of your stomach. Allow your stomach to expand, like a balloon, as it fills with air. Then slowly exhale through your nose and expel all of the air from your body. Breathe in deeply again, allowing the air to fill your stomach as before. Each time you inhale, take in the positive energy & light around you. Let it fill & calm your soul. Each time you exhale, push out your negative energy & fear. Continue to do this until you feel calm.

    * — * — * — * — *

    Slow down, be in the now.

2 Comments

  1. Ahh, I love the melting pot! And that martini is my favorite.

    I’ve been trying to comment on your last few posts but your comment box wouldn’t work for me. :/ I was getting so confused.

    Also, I didn’t realize you’re going to be 30! For some reason I always thought you were like 25!

    1. Ugh, I’ve been having some serious commenting issues. I tried to install Facebook comments but it was wonky. I didn’t like it at all. I did receive several great comments, but when I switched back I lost them all. Oh well, I’m back to the standard commenting system and keeping it this way — not worth the headache!

      Also, thank you so much! OMG. I’m so flattered that you thought I was younger. I hardly ever hear that. Oh well, age is only a number. I’m really looking forward to embracing my third decade!!! ;]

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