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6 Tips for Stress-Free Holidays

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1. Surround Yourself with Beauty — Surround yourself with the things that you love. Whether it is holiday music, white Christmas lights, or paper snowflakes. Decorate your surroundings in a way that makes you smile. Centering yourself among beautiful things will lift your mood throughout the season. Make sure to include your office, your car (or bike), and your living space.

2. Interact with Positive People — Everyone and their mother seems to be in town around the holiday season. That does not mean that you need to allow toxic people (or places) into your life.

Make this year the year that you break the tradition of exchanging gifts with your old college buddy, Nate the negative. Cut out the toxic people. Surround yourself with the people that put a smile on your face, encourage you, and lift your spirits. This can get tricky when it comes to family, but do what is right for you. No exceptions.

3. Use the Envelope System for Shopping — Before you hit the malls and the stores, make a budget. Determine how much money you are going to spend for each person and in each store. Then put the designated amount of money in an envelope before you head out. You will have enough money to get exactly what you need and only what you need. No cheating. Leave any extra cash and credit cards at home!

This is a guaranteed way to avoid the stress of overspending and impulse purchases.

4. Don’t Overeat — The holidays are filled with cookies, cakes, hams, mashed potatoes, wine, beer, chocolate, and candy canes… just to name a few. Don’t allow yourself to go completely overboard until the buttons of your pants are popping off.

Make conscious decisions about food. Limit yourself to two cookies or two glasses of wine instead of five. Use smaller plates. It has been proven that smaller plates lead to smaller portions. Eat a few small meals each day. Carry healthy snacks with you to avoid hunger pains and cravings — a bag of almonds, baby carrots, or a box of raisins will do the trick.

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5. Turn the Other Cheek — Even though the holidays are the “most wonderful time of the year” for many people they can also be the most stressful. The traffic gets congested. The shopping malls become hellish. The holiday bills pile up. A lot of people are on edge and tensions run high. It is a perfect storm for confrontation.

If you go into the season with an attitude of tranquility, peace, and forgiveness you stand a much better chance of avoiding conflict. If a confrontation is headed in your direction try to avoid it. If push comes to shove and you are drawn in against your will, turn the other cheek.

Whether it be road rage in a parking lot while fighting for a spot or a nasty comment from Uncle Bill at the dinner table, taking the high road is the best policy. Let the other person be the bad guy and absorb the negative karma that comes with being a jerk. Remember that you are way above that. Do not let anyone or anything move you from your path of happiness and light.

6. Turn Off the Negative Thoughts — If you work hard and follow all of these tips, you can experience your most joyful holiday season yet. However, there is one nasty habit that could ruin it all: negative thinking. Nip it in the bud before it even starts!

If you feel negative thoughts beginning to accumulate in your mind, stop. Take a deep breath. Remind yourself that you are in control.

Do not let your negative thoughts get the better of you. Change every negative, irrational thought into a positive, rational one. Focus on the beauty around you. Count your blessings each day and night. Live happiness, constantly make sure that what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony.

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Wishing you a warm & beautiful holiday season full of love, light, and hope.

Truly,

Dena

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    My Journey to Financial Freedom | Part 1: The Fall

    Three years ago, I was nearly $60,000 in debt. I had a Bachelor’s degree that didn’t appear to be worth its weight in salt and a job that couldn’t cover a fraction of my monthly bills. I was terrified.

    Today, I am closer to complete financial freedom than I ever dreamed possible. Last week, I paid off my last remaining credit card balance. This two-part post is a celebration of this incredible milestone in my journey.

    In part one, I will explain how I got to that terrible place. In part two, I will explain how I’m getting out of it (and how you can do it, too).

    ————————————————————————

    A financial prison is the worst sort of prison to be stuck in. A financial prison does not have steel bars or a prison warden. You will not get sent to financial prison for committing a crime. There is only one person that can sentence you to financial prison. That person is you.

    There are two primary types of financial prisoners:

    1. There are those in financial prison who got there because they truly did not know any better. This type eventually realizes the error of their ways and breaks free.

    2. There are those who knowingly commit themselves to financial prison. This type is well aware of the consequences of living beyond her means; but she does it anyway.

    Of course there are also those who fall somewhere in the middle, like me… (Cue dream sequence.) It all started when I was 18. The guidance counseling systems in my high school and college were either completely inadequate or I simply refused to pay attention. I can’t honestly remember which it was, though I think it was the former. Either way, I was screwed.

    Before me, no one in my family had ever been to college so I didn’t receive much advice. I was thrilled to be out of high school and ready for the next step. I took my SATs one time and applied to one school. My parents, being average folks, made just enough money to prevent me from receiving financial aid; but not enough money to be able to pay my full tuition. For me, this meant loans: “lovely” student loans from “lovely” Sallie Mae.

    My mother co-signed and it was a cinch from there. Each semester I filled out a relatively simple form and like magic, Sallie Mae sent me a check. In fact, Sallie Mae was so generous that they allowed me to take out as much “extra” money as I needed every semester. It was fantastic! Yes, I had money to pay for books, meals, and extra curricula. I also had money to go out and binge drink, buy clothes I didn’t need, designer purses, and more. Sallie Mae was wonderful to me. And the best part if it was that there was no need for discussion. No one guided me, no one advised me, and no one asked me any questions. I showed up at the financial aid office a couple of times each year and it was always smooth sailing.

    On top of that, another great thing happened when I was 18! The credit card companies started to send me applications. And that was just as easy. I got one and then another and then another. Whatever I couldn’t cover with those pretty little checks from Sallie Mae, I could simply charge on my credit cards. College was good to me. I joined a sorority, I partied hard, I shopped until I dropped. What more could a girl ask for?

    It wasn’t all fun & games though. I worked through college. I worked at a children’s camp each summer; I was a Spanish teacher for two years; and toward the end of my college career I was a bookseller at Borders bookstore. All of the money I made working was spending money for me. I had Sallie Mae and the credit cards to pay all of my “real” bills.

    When I finally graduated, I was making a cool $8.25 an hour at Borders. I loved it. I was happy… until one day, out of no where, a letter came in the mail. I had a six month grace period and then I would have to start paying back those loans. My paychecks barely covered my minimum credit card payments. How was I going to make loan payments on top of that?

    So I sat down and did something that I’d never done before. I wrote up a budget. It was horrifying when I realized that even if I’d had no other bills, my monthly wages from Borders wouldn’t even cover half of my monthly student loan payments. The jig was up.

    All told, I came out of college with about $45,000 in student loan debt and almost $15,000 in credit card debt. I hadn’t even lived on campus; I commuted from home; my parents paid for some of my tuition; and I only went to a mediocre school. How the hell was this possible?

    All of a sudden Sallie Mae and the credit card companies didn’t seem so lovely anymore. There was one thought that kept repeating over & over in my head: Why didn’t anyone warn me? I felt cheated, betrayed, angry, afraid, and helpless. I wondered what the people in the financial aid office had been doing all that time. I wondered why my high school guidance counselor didn’t press me harder about applying for scholarships or grants. I wondered a lot of things, but mostly I wondered how the hell I was going to get out of the mess.

    I started sending out resumes for jobs with starting salaries that would at least cover my monthly student loan payments. I sent out resume after resume but before long, I realized another harsh reality. That Bachelor’s Degree in English with a Creative Writing Focus wasn’t so great either. Nobody was calling me back. I couldn’t even get an interview.

    The clock was ticking. I was halfway through my grace period. Then one day, one of my best friends mentioned an opening in her office. I looked over the job description and realized that it had nothing to do with what I’d gone to school for. I didn’t even know what it actually was, but the starting salary was more than what I needed. The rest was history.

    I’ve been at my current company for almost three years now. And yesterday I paid off my last remaining credit card balance! Additionally over these few years, I’ve cut my student loan debt almost in half and by next Winter, I will have it down to a quarter of what I started with.

    Stay tuned for tomorrow’s post, where I will share how I am doing it and how you can do it, too.

5 Comments

  1. Nice post. This is a very stressful time of year for everyone. I find a nice cup of hot chocolate helps. 🙂

  2. Great post once again Dena! Although I always have a problem with the whole not over-eating thing I think this is the year I'll only take back a couple Shortbread cookies. I think that you nailed one of the most important tips with the "Interact with Positive people" Tip – If you let negativite people get in the way of your happiness you are just as guilty as they are for being a Scrooge. Get out, have fun and live it up – We only live once so make it worth it!

  3. @The Coolest Cool – Exactly! You've got such an awesome on life, I could not have put it better myself. I'm right there with you with he over-eating on the holidays. I really screwed myself up at Thanksgiving, I've vowed not to repeat that mistake at Christmas & New Years! Good luck with the cookies. ;o)

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