
Three years ago, I was nearly $60,000 in debt. I had a Bachelor’s degree that didn’t appear to be worth its weight in salt and a job that couldn’t cover a fraction of my monthly bills. I was terrified.
Today, I am closer to complete financial freedom than I ever dreamed possible. Last week, I paid off my last remaining credit card balance. This two-part post is a celebration of this incredible milestone in my journey.
In part one, I will explain how I got to that terrible place. In part two, I will explain how I’m getting out of it (and how you can do it, too).
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A financial prison is the worst sort of prison to be stuck in. A financial prison does not have steel bars or a prison warden. You will not get sent to financial prison for committing a crime. There is only one person that can sentence you to financial prison. That person is you.
There are two primary types of financial prisoners:
1. There are those in financial prison who got there because they truly did not know any better. This type eventually realizes the error of their ways and breaks free.
2. There are those who knowingly commit themselves to financial prison. This type is well aware of the consequences of living beyond her means; but she does it anyway.
Of course there are also those who fall somewhere in the middle, like me… (Cue dream sequence.) It all started when I was 18. The guidance counseling systems in my high school and college were either completely inadequate or I simply refused to pay attention. I can’t honestly remember which it was, though I think it was the former. Either way, I was screwed.
Before me, no one in my family had ever been to college so I didn’t receive much advice. I was thrilled to be out of high school and ready for the next step. I took my SATs one time and applied to one school. My parents, being average folks, made just enough money to prevent me from receiving financial aid; but not enough money to be able to pay my full tuition. For me, this meant loans: “lovely” student loans from “lovely” Sallie Mae.
My mother co-signed and it was a cinch from there. Each semester I filled out a relatively simple form and like magic, Sallie Mae sent me a check. In fact, Sallie Mae was so generous that they allowed me to take out as much “extra” money as I needed every semester. It was fantastic! Yes, I had money to pay for books, meals, and extra curricula. I also had money to go out and binge drink, buy clothes I didn’t need, designer purses, and more. Sallie Mae was wonderful to me. And the best part if it was that there was no need for discussion. No one guided me, no one advised me, and no one asked me any questions. I showed up at the financial aid office a couple of times each year and it was always smooth sailing.
On top of that, another great thing happened when I was 18! The credit card companies started to send me applications. And that was just as easy. I got one and then another and then another. Whatever I couldn’t cover with those pretty little checks from Sallie Mae, I could simply charge on my credit cards. College was good to me. I joined a sorority, I partied hard, I shopped until I dropped. What more could a girl ask for?
It wasn’t all fun & games though. I worked through college. I worked at a children’s camp each summer; I was a Spanish teacher for two years; and toward the end of my college career I was a bookseller at Borders bookstore. All of the money I made working was spending money for me. I had Sallie Mae and the credit cards to pay all of my “real” bills.
When I finally graduated, I was making a cool $8.25 an hour at Borders. I loved it. I was happy… until one day, out of no where, a letter came in the mail. I had a six month grace period and then I would have to start paying back those loans. My paychecks barely covered my minimum credit card payments. How was I going to make loan payments on top of that?
So I sat down and did something that I’d never done before. I wrote up a budget. It was horrifying when I realized that even if I’d had no other bills, my monthly wages from Borders wouldn’t even cover half of my monthly student loan payments. The jig was up.
All told, I came out of college with about $45,000 in student loan debt and almost $15,000 in credit card debt. I hadn’t even lived on campus; I commuted from home; my parents paid for some of my tuition; and I only went to a mediocre school. How the hell was this possible?
All of a sudden Sallie Mae and the credit card companies didn’t seem so lovely anymore. There was one thought that kept repeating over & over in my head: Why didn’t anyone warn me? I felt cheated, betrayed, angry, afraid, and helpless. I wondered what the people in the financial aid office had been doing all that time. I wondered why my high school guidance counselor didn’t press me harder about applying for scholarships or grants. I wondered a lot of things, but mostly I wondered how the hell I was going to get out of the mess.
I started sending out resumes for jobs with starting salaries that would at least cover my monthly student loan payments. I sent out resume after resume but before long, I realized another harsh reality. That Bachelor’s Degree in English with a Creative Writing Focus wasn’t so great either. Nobody was calling me back. I couldn’t even get an interview.
The clock was ticking. I was halfway through my grace period. Then one day, one of my best friends mentioned an opening in her office. I looked over the job description and realized that it had nothing to do with what I’d gone to school for. I didn’t even know what it actually was, but the starting salary was more than what I needed. The rest was history.
I’ve been at my current company for almost three years now. And yesterday I paid off my last remaining credit card balance! Additionally over these few years, I’ve cut my student loan debt almost in half and by next Winter, I will have it down to a quarter of what I started with.
Stay tuned for tomorrow’s post, where I will share how I am doing it and how you can do it, too.
Keep an even keel and even when times are difficult, be positive and things will eventually turn for the better. Reach out to friends and family, trust yourself and try to do a little good each day.
Thanks for the thoughts, Lou. Excellent advice.
Wow, very good stuff. Life can be such an adventure. That adventure is not always fun. I have heard that those things that do not kill you make you stronger. If that is the case my wife and I are giants in the land. We have had our fair share of ugly stuff. Through it all we have clung to God and one another for the strength, love and guidance to get us through. One day at a time, that is all that we can do. None of us are promised a tomorrow so the best we can do, is to do the best we can with what we have today.
I’ve heard that, too. “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.” Although–during the dark times–it can be difficult to accept, I do believe that it is the truth. Thank you so much for your presence here, friend. <3
As I submit my novel and listen to the crickets chirping, I can say with certainty that I am in the midst of one of those valleys of life. It is the loneliest place I’ve ever been, to have created something, to keep putting it out there, and to get………..nothing. I heard so many horror stories about rejection letters, and I cannot even get one.
In our darkest places, we still have to believe in ourselves, to pull from the buried reserves of inner strength that will move us forward. Heck, some days I have to pour figurative gasoline on the cold embers that remain in the dirt at the very bottom of that pit of buried reserve. It isn’t easy, but it’s all part of growing. When we stop growing, we die.
Just reading your comment gives me a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach. I haven’t written about it, but in my past life I was a poet. That’s what I went to school for. It is “what” I was, and more importantly “who” I was. I defined myself by that word and by my ability to succeed at being that word.
I remember the cold, nauseating impact of rejection.. after rejection… after rejection. It was so incredibly hard. I had to learn two things and I hope that these things will help you, too (even if in the smallest of ways):
1. A word (poet, novelist, writer, accountant, coach, speaker) can never define us. It’s a simple sentiment but gaze at it, it’s quite powerful.
2. A thousand horrible rejections will be washed away with one simple acceptance. It took years for me and then one day I was published in the Columbia Review. I know that it will happen for you, too. Don’t give up.
Best of luck wading through these dark moments, my dear friend. I am thinking of you & sending you bunches of love & light. xo
Hey Dena, I loved this article. I really needed to be uplifted. I am definitely going through some hard times in my life right now. Being unemployed and having a hard time finding employment, not know how I am going to pay my bills, but I realize I am not the only one who is going through what I am. I will keep taking it one day at a time, continue to look, and know that there is something out there for me, but that God has not led me to it yet, or it is not the time right now. I have to remember that I have a great family, and a Masters Degree in Social Work that I am almost done with that no one can take away from me. Thank you for the great message.
You are so welcome Michelle. I am so proud of you. Keep pushing forward. <3
Dena…. I love you!! You are the best and this makes my Friday. I am going through a transition at work where I am being pulled in a thousand different directions. Hard times….yes. But could it be worse. Of course. So I read your post and I smile becasue you remind me that life is life, and what happens- happens. I need to stop worrying about how it could be simpler and focus on what I can do now. Thanks Again.
You are so welcome, Meg! I am so happy to hear that this resonated with you. Best of luck through the transition. XO
Awesome reminder of the power of God.