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Thought Tracking Sheet: Cognitive Behavioral Therapy

It has been two decades since I learned the power of thought tracking and it saved my life. I first wrote about thought tracking in 2009, today, 13 years later, I am sharing the tool so that you can use it yourself. I have created this free thought tracking sheet that you can use to track, understand, and change your thoughts.

Click here to download the sheet now. Read on for more information about how the sheet works and how to use it.

For people who suffer from anxiety, distorted thoughts are very common—so common, in fact, that they become automatic. Learning how to stop automatic, negative, irrational thoughts is a powerful tool for overcoming anxiety.

Using a thought tracking sheet like this one is an effective method for changing our thought processes. You can use this sheet, to track your thoughts as they occur to you. Or at the end of the day, you can reflect on thoughts that you had throughout the day, and fill in this sheet. If you do wait to the end of the day to fill in your sheet, it may be helpful to jot things down during the day to come back to later.

When you download the sheets, you will find 2 pages. The first is a sample sheet that show examples of how to use the sheet. The second is a blank sheet for you to fill in yourself. You can print this and write in your thoughts or the sheet is available as a Google Drive document if you prefer to type your thoughts in.

As you use begin to use this powerful tool, you will be amazed at the results. Tracking your thoughts in this manner will absolutely change your life if you stick with it. Commit to this process and watch your life transform.

Now let’s talk about thought tracking and why it is so powerful.

Anxiety is caused by negative, irrational thoughts. All people experience negative, irrational thoughts occasionally. However, in the anxious mind negative, irrational thoughts are too frequent and intense. It is healthy to have a balance of rational, healthy thoughts and occasional negative, irrational thoughts. But when there is an imbalance, anxiety arises. The frequency and intensity of the negative, irrational thoughts makes way for mental illness. The person is unable to see through the negativity and irrationality. Anxiety consumes them.

This was the case for me for the first 20 years of my life and as such, I was so overwhelmed by my anxiety that I became suicidal. This is why I say that learning to change my thoughts saved my life. I am most certain that if I had stayed on the path that I was on, I would not be alive today.

This is the power of changing your thought process. It can transform and save your life.

By using a thought tracking sheet like this one, with practice, you can learn to change your negative, irrational thoughts into positive, rational thoughts. YOu can eliminate anxiety, overcome mental illness, and live in peace.

You Are Not Your Thoughts and Your Thoughts Are Not Always True

The first step to changing your thoughts is to understand that you are not your thoughts, you are the conscious presence behind your thoughts. If you quiet your mind for a moment and be still, so that no thoughts are running through your mind, you will notice that you still exist. You are still present. You are still breathing. That presence is who you are. Your thoughts are not you, they are just thoughts.

To overcome anxiety, we must recognize our thoughts for what they are and understand that they are not who we are. This distinction is critical. We must never be completely identified with our thoughts. We must always remember that our thoughts come and go. They are not real and we do not have to believe them. Our thoughts are not always true or valid. Just because you think something, that doesn’t make it true. Learn to question your thoughts. They are just thoughts, passing through your mind. You have control over your thoughts, not the other way around.

Identifying the Types of Thoughts

Negative irrational thoughts are just that—negative and irrational. Likewise, positive, rational thoughts are positive and rational. Most anxious people have been anxious for so long that they do not even realize that most of their thoughts are negative and irrational. In other words, they can’t see the forest through the trees.

This is why thought tracking is so important. We write our thoughts down and they are suddenly very clear and visible to us. From here, we can recognize our thoughts for what they are and we can begin to change them. Many people want to skip the part where you have to write down your thoughts because it can be tedious. But for the anxious mind this is a most critical step. We must first write down our thoughts and manually change them. With time, this will happen automatically. But in the beginning, writing them down is critical. It is like learning any new skill. You must start out slow and eventually, you will master it.

For me, it took about 6 months of writing my thoughts down, and then one day it began to happen automatically. I no longer needed to write them down. Your mind will just begin to transform thoughts automatically. It will be incredible and life changing. But do not rush to that point. Put in the work now of writing down your thoughts. It will be worth it.

The easiest way to sight the difference between negative, irrational thoughts and positive rational thoughts is by comparing examples. Let’s look at a few now.

Negative Irrational: It is raining out this morning. I am definitely going to have a bad day.
Positive Rational: It is raining out this morning. What a gift! It has been dry for awhile, we desperately need the water.

Negative Irrational: My parents are on the verge of losing their house. This is all my fault. I should have never been born.
Positive Rational: It is unfortunate about my parent’s financial situation. Still, I recognize that their problems are not my own. I will offer them love and support with healthy boundaries in place.

Negative Irrational: That guy just hit my car bumper. Just my luck. I can’t afford this. I’m going to be late for work. I’m going to get fired. Bad things always happen to me. If I lose my job, I will lose my house. I am on the verge of being homeless.
Positive Rational: That guy just hit my car bumper. Thank goodness that I am not hurt and we were both doing the speed limit. This could have been a lot worse.

In these examples we can see the difference between the thought types. There are many more examples on the sheet. Every thought has the potential to be either negative or positive. And every thought has the potential to be either irrational or rational. Learning to switch our thought process in this way is the path to freedom from anxiety.

How to Change Your Thoughts by Practice

Writing thoughts down on your thought tracking sheet throughout the day is the best method of tracking your thoughts. Every time you start to feel anxious, write down the thoughts that pass through your mind. If you have time in the moment, you can begin to analyze your thoughts by filling out the other columns on the sheet.

Write down the situation, what actually happened to cause the thoughts. Write down the actual thoughts. Write down the emotions that the thoughts made you feel. Write down your behavior in reaction to the thoughts. And finally, write down an alternate thought. Your original thought will usually be negative and irrational, so your alternate thought should be positive and rational.

It’s that simple! This process, as simple as it may seem, absolutely has the power to change your life. I am telling you this from experience. It completely changed, and saved, my life. It can do the same for you if you stick with it.

In Closing

If you haven’t done so yet, go ahead and download your free thought tracking sheet.

What I have shared here today is the basic outline for tracking your thoughts. WHile I used this method to get a strong handle on my anxiety, sometimes my anxiety catches up with me, even today, two decades since I started this practice. Whenever that happens, I just go back to the basic. I track my thoughts again until I find my mindset changing.

Over the years, I have continued to educate myself about the power of thinking, human behavior and cognitive behavioral therapy. I have learned so much and in coming posts, I will share much more. Stay tuned.

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    Tired of Conflict Bringing You Down?

    Dealing With Conflict

    Conflict takes many forms—misunderstanding, frustration, ignorance, hatred, envy, and so on—but despite the cause, the result is largely the same: someone walks away with hurt feelings.

    The truth is, however, that this is not necessary. You can choose to be unaffected by conflict. It is not an easy thing to accomplish. You have, after all, lived your life believing that conflict equals pain. But with practice & patience you can learn to live above conflict in a place of true peace.

    “True peace can not be disturbed by gain or loss.”

    The reason that conflict hurts us is because we allow it to. Most pain comes from another person(s) or from our own minds. The key to being unaffected by conflict is to understand that anything that another person says to us (out of anger, frustration, etc.) is actually a reflection of her feelings about herself and is rooted in fear. Likewise, anything that our mind says to us (self-criticism, self-hatred, etc.) is also rooted in fear. All forms of discomfort—sadness, anxiety, worry, rage, hatred, envy, and so on—are rooted in fear.

    When you accept that angry words are actually reflections of fear, it makes them much less painful to tolerate. Even the angriest and most cruel of arguments is based in fear & insecurity.

    For example, you have a large project due at work. You bring it into your boss’s office an hour prior to the deadline. She notices that it is riddled with errors. Her face turns red and she begins to scream. “You idiot! How could you be so stupid? This is unacceptable. I can not believe I ever hired you. Get out!”

    On one hand, you are devastated. Her words have stung you at your core. You are insulted, sad, angry, afraid. But if you really stop to analyze the situation, why do you think she acted this way? Most likely, she is afraid. Most likely, she is terrified about the way that your “failure” is going to reflect on her. After all, wasn’t it her who hired you, gave you this assignment, failed to give you proper instruction, and so on? What will her boss think when she turns this project into him? Her explosion was based in fear.

    Another example, it is Saturday afternoon and you are sitting on the couch. Your husband comes in the door and notices that you have not swept the floors. He begins to speak angrily, “Haven’t you swept the floors? Didn’t you see this dirt? You’ve been so lazy recently.” You are crushed and devastated. How could he be so mean? But then again, you stop and analyze. The lawn is not mowed, the gutters are uncleaned, there are piles of crap strewn about the yard. Your husband is insecure about all of his unfinished chores and is projecting his self-frustration onto you. His remarks were based in fear and insecurity.

    If you take the time to truly analyze, you will find that almost every conflict is rooted in fear. Therefore, the vast majority of hurtful things that are ever said to you actually have absolutely nothing to do with you. This is an incredibly liberating concept (not to be confused with the rare scenario when you are actually wrong by the way). Still, just because the other person’s (or even your own self-inflicted) anger is based in fear, that still doesn’t make it right. Yes, perhaps both your boss and your husband were entirely out of line. It is alright for you to tell them so, but what is more important is the way that you process the conflict within yourself.

    Most people internalize the conflict. In any case, you take what was said and push it deep within yourself. Perhaps you believe the other person words. “Yes, I am lazy, stupid, ugly, etc.” The conflict turns into emotional pain and festers within you eventually becoming depression, anxiety, and so on. But as I mentioned at the start, none of that is necessary.

    You must accept the conflict (words) for what they are—someone else’s (or even your own mind’s) fears and insecurities. Fear is nothing to be afraid of or affected by. Most fear is completely unnecessary (read more about that).

    After the conflict, words, and judgments have passed, simply allow all of it to pass through and around you like water or air. Understand that it is something outside of you, that has nothing to do with you at all. It is not inside of you, it did not come from you, and you do not have to absorb it. Simply let it pass and then move on.

    Holding onto the pain of conflict is insane and unnatural. What do the birds do after the great storm has passed? They sing, of course! You will never hear the birds singing so sweetly and so loudly as they do after the storm has passed and the sun shines again. They do not mourn the broken nest, the wet feathers, or the lost supper. They simply sing and praise the light in gratitude. They rejoice that the sun has come again.

    In his book, The Power of Now: A Guide to Spiritual Enlightenment, Eckhart Tolle talks about his observation of duck fights. Two ducks approach one another. They squawk in anger for mere seconds. Then they turn away from one another, flap their great wings a few times, and swim on as if it never happened. This is true wisdom, true peace, in action. There is so much that we can learn from this simple observation.

    There is really no need to hold onto anger or discomfort. There is really no need to suffer. In life, you will find many reason to suffer. But a good reason to suffer, you will never find. Let conflicts pass through and around you. Do not hold onto them. You will almost always find that it never has anything to do with you anyway.

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